Family constellations

Family constellation works allows to reconnect with what has been excluded, disregarded, or silenced in the family dynamic. Through a process of becoming aware of these exclusions, or unresolved issues and their effects on the members of the family and oneself; the person can integrate those experiences making more space within. This broader awareness brings more balance to oneself and automatically into the family system by creating more inner flexibility to understand the events that were difficult, therefore excluded, or unresolved.

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Family constellations show the interconnectedness between one and others, and between the different parts in one person. Every existing entity (living organism*) such as a disease, emotion or thought have a longing for integrity. Not only in a personal level, but also in wider levels such as countries and organisations. By giving space to all the excluded/negated/repressed parts to appear in the systemic constellation work, we allow the person/system to gradually recover its own balance of awareness. Sometimes, we see that the symptom (e.g., emotional struggle, disease) is a manifestation of something that has been carried through generations without resolution and been seen. This happened because in the particular moment of trauma the coping mechanisms were insufficient or not mature enough. Family constellation work shows that there is an underlying awareness of what has not been resolved for generations until someone responds bringing awareness to the whole intergenerational system.

We see reality under particular lenses. These lenses have been conditioned by our educational system, family history, and our karmic imprints (*see buddhist view on Karma). We live generation through generation without questioning these core beliefs until our sense of dissatisfaction is so uncomfortable that a radical change is sought in the family system. The dis-ease, experienced by a family member, is somatized or verbalized as a symptom (disease, emotional struggle, spiritual crisis) allowing healing to take place in all levels: past, present and future. 

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As a family constellation facilitator and representative, I would say that family constellations are a journey towards our most intimate being. We discover how we see reality and unlearn mental habits that are detrimental to our sense of inner happiness. We surrender to the duality of what was good and what was bad in our family history and we become friends with whatever happened in our history. By developing less duality and more integration with our family history, we are more at ease with our world whatever it is. We become less demanding on the world to change, rather we contribute with vigor to a fresh future. 

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Through family constellation work, we go through the difficult moments of life again. Those moments where we remained perplexed and frozen in trauma. The difference is that now we have the resources to cope with them in a more skillful way. We can wholeheartedly accept what we could not do and move forward with appreciation and grace. Through family constellation we initially begin to recognise our intrinsic nature, which is infinitely spacious and not polarized between trauma and not trauma.  This is the beginning of well-being : being less divided.